I learned from my mother how to love

我从妈妈那里学会

the living, to have plenty of vases on hand

如何爱生活，当你不得不抱着

in case you have to rush to the hospital

大花瓶小花瓶冲进医院，

with peonies cut from the lawn, black ants

里面插着从草地上剪下的野芍药，

still stuck to the buds. I learned to save jars

花苞上还爬着黑蚂蚁。我学会

large enough to hold fruit salad for a whole

把那些大罐子留起来，

grieving household, to cube home-canned pears

好在白事来了的时候装足够的水果沙拉

and peaches, to slice through maroon grape skins

招待一屋子沉默的亲戚，我学会

and flick out the sexual seeds with a knife point.

自制梨肉和桃肉罐头，学会

I learned to attend viewings even if I didn’t know

把刀尖插入酱红葡萄的皮肤，

the deceased, to press the moist hands

挑出那性感的小种子。

of the living, to look in their eyes and offer

我学会去探望那些病人，

sympathy, as though I understood loss even then.

即使我从不认识他们，握住

I learned that whatever we say means nothing,

那汗津津的活人的手，望着

what anyone will remember is that we came.

他们的眼睛递去同情，虽然

I learned to believe I had the power to ease

那时我还不懂

awful pains materially like an angel.

“永远消失”意味着什么。

Like a doctor, I learned to create

我学会我们说的一切话都不算数，

from another’s suffering my own usefulness, and once

人们记住的是我们做了些什么。

you know how to do this, you can never refuse.

我学会相信我有能力减轻

To every house you enter, you must offer

巨大的痛苦，就像天使一般。

healing: a chocolate cake you baked yourself,

就像一个医生，我学会了从妈妈的痛苦中，

the blessing of your voice, your chaste touch.

凝炼出自己的有用之才，一旦

你知道如何这样做，你会永远忍不住接着尝试。

在任何一个你进入的房间，你一定要

想办法治愈：用

一个你手制的巧克力蛋糕，

你祝福的声音，你纯洁的触摸。