我从妈妈那里学会

I learned from my mother how to love

如何爱生活，当你不得不抱着

the living, to have plenty of vases on hand

大花瓶小花瓶冲进医院，

in case you have to rush to the hospital

里面插着从草地上剪下的野芍药，

with peonies cut from the lawn, black ants

花苞上还爬着黑蚂蚁。我学会

still stuck to the buds. I learned to save jars

把那些大罐子留起来，

large enough to hold fruit salad for a whole

好在白事来了的时候装足够的水果沙拉

grieving household, to cube home-canned pears

招待一屋子沉默的亲戚，我学会

and peaches, to slice through maroon grape skins

自制梨肉和桃肉罐头，学会

and flick out the sexual seeds with a knife point.

把刀尖插入酱红葡萄的皮肤，

I learned to attend viewings even if I didn’t know

挑出那性感的小种子。

the deceased, to press the moist hands

我学会去探望那些病人，

of the living, to look in their eyes and offer

即使我从不认识他们，握住

sympathy, as though I understood loss even then.

那汗津津的活人的手，望着

I learned that whatever we say means nothing,

他们的眼睛递去同情，虽然

what anyone will remember is that we came.

那时我还不懂

I learned to believe I had the power to ease

“永远消失”意味着什么。

awful pains materially like an angel.

我学会我们说的一切话都不算数，

Like a doctor, I learned to create

人们记住的是我们做了些什么。

from another’s suffering my own usefulness, and once

我学会相信我有能力减轻

you know how to do this, you can never refuse.

巨大的痛苦，就像天使一般。

To every house you enter, you must offer

就像一个医生，我学会了从妈妈的痛苦中，

healing: a chocolate cake you baked yourself,

凝炼出自己的有用之才，一旦

the blessing of your voice, your chaste touch.

你知道如何这样做，你会永远忍不住接着尝试。

在任何一个你进入的房间，你一定要

想办法治愈：用

一个你手制的巧克力蛋糕，

你祝福的声音，你纯洁的触摸。