耶稣受难赞美圣歌adieudusk 译

Tenebrae杰弗里·希爾

他如此疲倦几乎难能听到圣歌的曲调:他感觉被囚禁在一个寒冷的地域,在那里他的大脑麻木精神孤绝。

He was so tired that he was scarcely able to hear a note of the songs: he felt imprisoned in a cold region where his brain was numb and his spirit was isolated.


1
1

报答这天使
Requite this angel whose
他发红和饥渴的脸
flushed and thirsting face
俯向它从中升起的
stoops to the sacrifice
献祭。
out of which it arose.
这是悲伤之主
This is the lord Eros
爱洛斯他无怜悯
of grief who pities
于任何人;那是长着疮的
no one; it is
拉撒路。
Lazarus with his sores.


2
2

而你,那有着温柔而寻觅的声音的人
And you, who with your soft but searching voice
从我迷失的睡梦中拽出我,
drew me out of the sleep where I was lost,
那将我举着贴近你的心的
who held me near your heart that I might rest
我将信赖地休憩在你的选择的黑暗中:
confiding in the darkness of your choice:
为你着迷我选择没有选择,
possessed by you I chose to have no choice,
在你之中得以圆满我不再寻求追问。
fulfilled in you I sought no further quest.
现在,你将我留在熄灭信任的恐惧中,
You keep me, now, in dread that quenches trust,
在荒寂中我的罪恶欢庆。
in desolation where my sins rejoice.
因为我热烈多情于是你带着痛苦
As I am passionate so you with pain
抵挡我的欲望;因为你似乎毫不动情
turn my desire; as you seem passionless
于是我从所有我将赢得之处退败,[1]
so I recoil from all that I would gain,
在遗忘之上伤害我自己,
wounding myself upon forgetfulness,
错误的心醉神迷,你在真实中将其支撑
false ecstasies, which you in truth sustain
就像你支撑你的十字架上的每一个物件。
as you sustain each item of your cross.


3
3

来吧救主[2],但不是在我们的时代。
Veni Redemptor, but not in our time.
基督从死中复生,远非这个世界。
Christus Resurgens, quite out of this world.
我们喊叫“Ave”[3];回音却返回。
‘Ave’ we cry; the echoes are returned.
肉欲之爱[4]是我们的居留之地。
Amor Carnalis is our dwelling-place.


4
4

哦光中之光,无上的喜悦;
O light of light, supreme delight;
让我们羞耻的我们唇上之恩典。
grace on our lips to our disgrace.
时间栖息于这样的金色的手腕;
Time roosts on all such golden wrists;
我们的羸瘦是我们的奢侈。
our leanness is our luxury.
我们的爱是我们想要拥有的;
Our love is what we love to have;
我们的信念是我们的节日。
our faith is in our festivals.


5
5

令人惊呆的梦中悲伤的形象,
Stupefying images of grief-in-dream,
我心中天然的悲伤的袭梦女妖[5],
succubae to my natural grief of heart,
那时缠着我;你那不愿在某些时间的空白中
cling to me, then; you who will not desert
抛弃你的爱也不愿失去他的。
your love nor lose him in some blank of time.
你带着她的名字的全部许可而来
You come with all the licence of her name
告诉我你是我的。但是你不是
to tell me you are mine. But you are not
她也不是。我自己的呼吸会被
and she is not. Can my own breath be hurt
她们的游戏中呻吟的无呼吸的影子伤害吗?
by breathless shadows groaning in their game?
它会。地狱最好的那些社群
It can. The best societies of hell
确认此事,由他们所知道的唤发:
acknowledge this, aroused by what they know:
完美的愤怒被完全体验
consummate rage recaptured there in full
正如忠诚所要求,点点滴滴,
as faithfulness demands it, blow for blow,
正直模仿它自己的坠落
and rectitude that mimics its own fall
以感官的禁欲和哀愁盘旋。
reeling with sensual abstinence and woe.


6
6

这是百合之火的灰坑,
This is the ash-pit of the lily-fire,
这是一张张长桌上的质问,
this is the questioning at the long tables,
这是自我在自我中的真正婚姻,
this is true marriage of the self-in-self,
这是欲望愤怒的孤独,
this is a raging solitude of desire,
这是淫秽相许的合唱,
this is the chorus of obscene consent,
这是最纯洁的赞美独一的声音。
this is a single voice of purest praise.


7
7

他被心醉神迷而伤害。所有的
He wounds with ecstasy. All
伤都是他自己的。
the wounds are his own.
他带着殉难者的王冠。
He wears the martyr’s crown.
他是暴政之主。
He is the Lord of Misrule.
他是跳跃的人的主人,
He is the Master of the Leaping Figures,
混杂的团伙。
the motley factions.
陶醉在占卜中[6]
Revelling in auguries
他是惜别辞的悲泣者。
he is the Weeper of the Valedictions.


8
8

音乐幸存,谱写她自己的天空,
Music survives, composing her own sphere,
诸多音调的天使,美杜莎,天上的女王,
Angel of Tones, Medusa, Queen of the Air,
当我们以真正的叫喊诱引她
and when we would accost her with real cries
银色覆银色让它自身颤栗成冰。
silver on silver thrills itself to ice.


【译注】
参考及对比阅读:
《圣经-诗篇》6,32,38,51,102,130,143
策兰《言栅》中的同名诗:
http://harpers.org/blog/2008/03/celans-tenebrae/
荷尔德林的Patmos:
Nah ist / Und schwer zu fassen, der Gott

注:
[1]中世纪以来诗歌传统中不可抵达的爱人形象
[2]来吧救主,Veni Redemptor, 出自米兰的安波罗修的拉丁圣歌“来吧,诸国的救主””Veni redemptor gentium" (Come, Redeemer of the nations) 。圣歌在十二月十七日至二十四日降临节的时辰祈祷中吟唱。希尔的诗句去掉了gentium(nations),跟以but not in our time,意味着救主并不降临尘世(诸国)和我们的时代。
http://www.preces-latinae.org/thesaurus/Hymni/VeniRedemptorG.html
[3]Ave,拉丁语:欢迎,一路平安,万福玛利亚。
[4]肉欲之爱,Amor Carnalis
[5]袭梦女妖,succuba,降临一个男子梦中并与其性交的女妖。
[6]占卜,augury,特指根据鸟的飞行占卜。


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